Tame Your Anxiety And Have A Happy Brain: Lessons From The Mammalian Kingdom We Can All Use

Have you been wondering how to manage anxiety, especially in midlife? Dr. Loretta Breuning is here to provide us with the answers! Join us on the latest episode of The Hormone Prescription Podcast and learn how the lessons from the mammalian kingdom can help us all have a happy brain. Not only will you learn about how hormones work within our bodies, but also gain insight into how simple changes in our environment can drastically change the way we feel.

 

Dr. Loretta Breuning, PhD, is the Founder of the Inner Mammal Institute and Professor Emerita of Management at California State University, East Bay. She is the author of many personal development books, including Habits of a Happy Brain: Retrain Your Brain to Boost Your Serotonin, Dopamine, Oxytocin, and Endorphin Levels and Tame your anxiety-rewire your brain for happiness and others.

 

As a teacher and a parent, she was not convinced by prevailing theories of human motivation. Then she learned about the brain chemistry we share with earlier mammals and everything made sense. She began creating resources that have helped thousands of people make peace with their inner mammal. Dr. Breuning's work has been translated into twelve languages and is cited in major media. Before teaching, she worked for the United Nations in Africa. Loretta gives zoo tours on animal behavior, after serving as a Docent at the Oakland Zoo.

 

In this episode, you'll learn:

- How the mammalian brain works

- The hormones that can affect your emotional state

- Simple strategies to rewire your brain for happiness and reduce anxiety

- How our environment plays a role in affecting our moods

 

Listen now to this powerful episode with Dr. Loretta Breuning and learn how you can have a happy brain!

 

(00:00): Nature is designed to habituate to the emotions that we already have. Stay tuned to find out why our happy chemicals are not designed to be on all the time.

 

(00:13): So the big question is, how do women over 40 like us, keep weight off, have great energy, balance our hormones and our moods, feel sexy and confident, and master midlife? If you're like most of us, you are not getting the answers you need and remain confused and pretty hopeless to ever feel like yourself Again. As an ob gyn, I had to discover for myself the truth about what creates a rock solid metabolism, lasting weight loss, and supercharged energy after 40, in order to lose a hundred pounds and fix my fatigue, now I'm on a mission. This podcast is designed to share the natural tools you need for impactful results and to give you clarity on the answers to your midlife metabolism challenges. Join me for tangible, natural strategies to crush the hormone imbalances you are facing and help you get unstuck from the sidelines of life. My name is Dr. Kyrin Dunston. Welcome to the Hormone Prescription Podcast.

 

(01:07): Hi everybody, and welcome back to another episode of the Hormone Prescription with Dr. Kyrin. Thank you so much for joining me today. Today we're gonna be talking about stress. Again, I know it's such an important topic, but we're gonna be relating it to your happy neurochemicals. We're going to be talking about dopamine and serotonin and oxytocin and endorphins and how you can optimize these neurochemicals for your hormonal and overall health and wellbeing, how you can get out of anxiety and many other things. She has a unique perspective that's comes from the animal kingdom, which we're a part of, but we're a little bit different and we're gonna talk about how we're different and how that affects our health and ways that you can manage your neurochemicals that other animals don't need to worry about. I'll tell you a little bit about her and then we'll get started.

 

(02:05): Dr. Loretta Bruning is a PhD and she's founder of the Inter Mammal Institute and Professor Erta of Management at California State University East Bay. She's the author of many personal development books, including Habits of a Happy Brain, retrain Your Brain to Boost your Serotonin, dopamine, oxytocin, and Endorphin levels. And the author of Tame Your Anxiety, rewire Your Brain for Happiness and other books. As a teacher and a parent, she was not convinced by prevailing theories of human motivation. Then she learned about the brain chemistry we share with earlier mammals and everything made sense. She began creating resources that have helped thousands of people make peace with their inner mammal. Dr. Bruni's work has been translated into 12 languages and is cited in major media before teaching. She worked for the United Nations in Africa and Loretta gives zoo tours on animals' behavior after serving as a docent at the Oakland Zoo. Welcome Dr. Loretta Bruning to the podcast.

 

(03:05): Hi. So nice to be here.

 

(03:07): I'm really glad to have you here. I think people are dealing with so much stress right now. Stress levels are at an all-time high and we can't talk about it enough. How can people get regulated out of the stress site, be happy in their lives, experience joy? I mean, after all, I think that's what we're here to do ultimately, but there are a lot of things that get in the way and I'm curious if you can share with everyone how did you get interested in brain neurochemical chemicals and how to have a happy brain? What was your path?

 

(03:42): Like many people, I grew up around a lot of unhappiness and I didn't have a good explanation for it. So I think I was always curious like, what is everybody so upset about? So I was always looking for that and nothing ever seemed like a good enough explanation. I studied academic psychology my whole life, so I knew all the theories, but they still didn't really explain it to me and especially becoming a parent and you think, okay, now gonna start over and we're gonna do everything right according to the book, you know? And I was like, no, that doesn't work. Kids are unhappy. My students were unhappy. So then I had to rethink what I had learned and I stumbled on a lot of animal studies monkey studies, and that triggered, you know, cuz when I was like 18 years old and started studying psychology, there were a lot of monkey studies and that's what got me into seeing that the chemicals that make us feel good are the exact same chemicals in animals and they're controlled by brain structures that animals have too. And to me, that explained everything first because a monkey is constantly making decisions. What's gonna make me happy? Oh, if I get that banana, how can I get it? And that's the job our happy chemicals do is reward us for those actions. And then that this whole animal brain is not capable of using language. So it's totally separate track from the stuff we're telling ourselves in words.

 

(05:20): Yes. You know, I think that we forget that we are animals and that we have the same brain structures as other animals and that our brain is really designed to keep us alive, but some of those systems can act negatively in humans and actually make us sick when we don't understand them and use them properly. And I think this is super important for women at midlife because we've kind of, most of us been using our brains and our systems unconsciously, and we don't really start paying attention to how they function until we hit midlife. And the cumulative negative effects start encroaching on our good health. And then we wanna know, oh my gosh, I don't feel well. And we discover that our brain neurochemistry is part of the reason why we don't do well. How can we work with it differently? So can you talk a little bit about the different brain structures and kind of how our neurochemistry works and then we can kind of dive into what people might be encountering in terms of maladaptations of these systems that causing them problems? Sure.

 

(06:36): So you've raised so many good issues and I'm gonna try to simplify. Sure. Get to the point as much as possible, but there's so much. So I always like to focus on the positive, you know, what can we do instead of just focusing on the problem? So the reality is that our happy brain chemicals are not designed to be on all the time. You hear about dopamine, serotonin, oxytocin and endorphin and you think, oh, other people must be just getting this all the time and what's wrong with me? And yet, when you know the job these chemicals do, you know that their job is only to be on for that moment to spark you into action when that action is appropriate. So for example, like a lion is looking around for something it can eat and if it runs after everything, it's not gonna get anything and it's gonna die of starvation.

 

(07:30): So dopamine turns on when it sees something it can get, and that's what our good feelings are like for that appropriate moment. So when we're not having that spark of joy, it's like no big deal. That's to the self-acceptance of my brain is designed to go up and down to navigate where should I use my energy? What's a good opportunity? And the other part of that is, well, how do I know what's a good opportunity and where should I use my energy? Well the amazing thing is my dopamine pathways are built from my own dopamine experience in my past. And your dopamine pathways are built from your past. So every little toddler is like trying to get that ball and get that cookie. And yet we're all building our pathways from our unique individual experience. And when I know my own pathways, that liberates me from being limited by them because you may think, oh, the only way to feel good is by repeating this behavior that triggered my good feelings in the past. But when you know that it's just a pathway, then you say, oh, there are thousands of other ways to be happy. I'm just doing this one because that's just the accident of my past experience.

 

(08:50): Yeah, we really are very programmed throughout our lives as to what's gonna make our dopamine reward pathway go up, what's gonna make our serotonin go up. It's gonna differ for every person. But I totally identify, and maybe you listening identify with this too, that I do wanna be happy all the time. Loretta . What's wrong with that? And you know, I think we see other people maybe on social media or friends that we have who really do seem like they're happy all the time. Why can't we be happy all the time?

 

(09:25): Okay, that's a great question. So first let's distinguish happy chemicals from unhappy chemicals. Okay, so I don't want to feel like I'm gonna die in every minute. So that's, yeah, like in in the animal brain, you are trying to escape from predators and starvation and the human brain is capable of imagining predators that are not actually there. That's how we stress ourselves. So we feel like we gotta run from this predator all the time, and that's horrible feelings. So absolutely, we should definitely wanna get away from that because that's the job our brain is designed to do is escape that threat. But if I want to feel joy every minute of every day, that's not realistic and I'm gonna end up disappointing. And if I tell myself that everybody else is feeling joy every minute of every day, then I'm gonna end up, you know, feeling left out. So, you know, there's this current movement of trying to feel the pleasure of small things. I think that's great, but the way the brain works is it habituates to what you already have. So if I think, let's say if I only get a date with this one person, I'll be happy forever. But then once you get the date with that person, you're not happy forever. Right,

 

(10:53): . So

 

(10:54): If you think, oh, if I only get this promotion, I'll be happy forever. But you get the promotion and you're not happy forever. So the reason is that our brain is designed to habituate to rewards we already have. So it's like saying that when my ancestors were hungry and they thought, oh, if I only found a tree full of riped fruit, I'd be so happy I'd, you know, I'd never be unhappy again. And they'd find the tree and they'd stuff their face with riped fruit. But if that made them happy forever, then they would not get any protein. They would not search for water and firewood. So our brain is designed to focus on the unmet need and to take for granted what you already have and say, okay, been there, done that. Now what else can I get? So that's the norm , which

 

(11:48): Yeah, I think everyone can relate to that. And I remember when I was younger, I would always think, I will be happy when, fill in the blank, you know, when I graduate high school, when I graduate college, when I graduate med school, you know, when I get married, when I have a baby. And like you would get to that and you do get that initial boost of, oh my gosh, this is so great, I'm so happy. And then it just becomes a factor of your life and it doesn't give you that dopamine kind of hit or serotonin boost. So I know everybody listening can really relate to that. And I love that you explained it, the nature's design to habituate to the emotions that we already have. And it is does confer survivability not only on the animal kingdom, but humans, which we're a part of the animal kingdom, but I think that sometimes we think we're superior because we have these huge four brains and that we should be able to surpass that. So how does someone who's maybe feeling dysthymic or even depressed really start to work in their lives to change their neurochemistry to a more positive state where they can get those boosts?

 

(13:03): Sure. So first is to understand that whatever triggers the happy chemical is based on not what you're telling yourself in words and philosophical abstractions, but it's a real physical pathway built from past experience. So a simple example would be, you know, if you give a child a cookie when they do a certain behavior, they're gonna repeat that behavior. So even if you're sad on some level, you got rewarded for being sad in your past. Mm-Hmm. because you felt like, well now I'm doing my share in carrying the load by being sad or something like that. So once you say, my sadness is a real physical pathway in my brain, my feelings about what it takes to turn on a reward chemical, those are real physical pathways in my brain. And I can build new pathways to have new expectations about how to turn on my happy chemicals. But it's hard to build new pathways in adulthood. It's exactly like learning language. When you're a child, you learn language easy. But if you try to study a foreign language in adulthood, it takes a lot of repetition and it feels like real work. And that's what it takes to build a new path to happy chemicals when you're older. Okay. One example.

 

(14:30): Sure. Yeah, that would be great.

 

(14:32): So, so the typical example would be negative expectations. Like if you think people don't like me, nothing I do works. Everything I, everything goes wrong in my life, you know, every, everyone can look for that o, that whatever is their own loop. And then look for, well, how did that pathway get built in my past? And then every time I feel it to say, oh, it's a real physical pathway, what other pathway could I have that would feel better? So my personal example was I always felt like people were criticizing me. Like I would jump to that conclusion all the time on no evidence at all. And then I would feel basically the terror of my childhood of being attacked and criticized. So what other pathway would I like to have will to just say other people are fine with me and I can feel good whether or not I have their approval. So I tell myself that, and the first time I do it, it sounds wrong and stupid and unbelievable, but I know that I, if I repeat it over and over and practice it, that I will build a real physical pathway in my brain and then it will just feel like my new normal.

 

(15:51): Okay, yeah, I love that. So we can change our neurochemistry studies have clearly documented that I know that some people listening deal with a lot of anxiety. You know, as our hormones change at midlife, when our estrogen starts going up and our progesterone starts going down, which can happen as early as 35, but definitely starts happening from 40 to 50. And by the time you hit menopause, you're really solidly in that category. You lose that ameliorative effect of the progesterone, which is the anti-anxiety hormone. So a lot of women at this stage of life deal with a lot of anxiety. What are some tools that we could start to use to help mitigate that?

 

(16:38): Sure. So to boil it down to one word that I use is called legacy. So legacy means my sense of what I can create that will live on after I'm gone. And the reason for this is if you think that we have this big human brain attached to this animal brain, so the animal brain is programmed to just search for survival and to fear survival threats. But my big human cortex can abstract and think about the future and it knows that I'm not gonna survive and there will be a future that will go on without me. And that is terrifying. And we can terrify ourselves all the time. Now, in the world of our past people died young, but they had children young. So if you had children like at 16, then you'd be a grandma at 32 if you lived that long. And so when you saw your grandchildren, you had a sense of legacy because you taught them how to chop vegetables and you saw them do it, and you had a sense of yourself living on after you're gone.

 

(17:46): So that was your legacy. And there was no, no birth control. So people were so busy taking care of children that they didn't have time to worry about dying as much, and they, they couldn't call 9 1 1, they couldn't get lab tests. So they just focused on like the next emergency of, you know, a kid's crying, how can I get food? And now like we don't really get to watch our grandchildren grow up for so many reasons. So we don't have that automatic sense of legacy. So we have to constant, consciously create a sense of legacy in one way or another.

 

(18:23): Yeah, that's, that's an interesting concept I hadn't thought about, but creating something for the future. And you're reminded me about the short lifespan that just a few hundred years ago we have, and I, I think it would be so interesting to see a study about people's ability to be in the present a few hundred years ago when they knew they were only gonna live, you know, 30 or 40 years. I bet that really focused them on, I gotta make the most of this time Yes. That I have. Whereas now we've got, you know, on average, I think 82 years in the US as the American lifespan for females. And I don't know about everybody else, but I feel like I waste a lot of time because it's like, oh, I won't do that thing now because I've got another, you know, few decades where I could do it. Whereas if I only had 32 years, well my life would've been over a while ago, but it really would've focused me. How do you think that has changed over time?

 

(19:25): Well that's, you know, to focus on the positive again. Yeah. Pause is a time when you say, geez, if I wait to be happy, I may wait too long. , you know, and so is it worth wasting another minute of my life worrying about X, Y, and Z? And you could make good arguments with your conscious verbal brain, oh, I should worry about X, Y, and Z. But then you could say, you know what? I could let it go because I'm not gonna get back the time that I waste on that. And also there's a lot of fearful images about the future, like even though I may live till X number of years that I'm gonna have a decline. And if you focus on that, then you're gonna be feeling the decline now. Mm-Hmm. . So it takes a real conscious effort to redirect yourself, you know? And like every time you see a wrinkle, for example, to instead of seeing that wrinkle as evidence of decline to say, this wrinkle gives me permission to stop worrying about X and to just start being happy. Now,

 

(20:34): I'm glad you brought this up. I recently came across an article in my newsfeed about the high demand for older aged female models. Recently there's been a boom and even 70 and 80 year old female models, right? Everybody is really starting to honor older women, their wisdom, which is what I think we really is the gift of menopause, is that the wisdom that we carry. We have lived long lives, we've seen a lot. I remember an attorney telling me once that when he went to jury trials and they did the voir deer where they select the jury, his favorite jurors were older women. And I asked him why. And he said, because they have been there, done that, seen everything. But they also have a lower ego and the maturity to understand the nuances of guilty, not guilty issues, which some younger people don't have. So all this to say also, I see in your bio, you've done a lot of interesting things. It says that you used to work for the United Nations in Africa, so you've lived a lot of life, you're at a certain stage outside of the work that you do with helping people to boost their neurochemistry. Just from a personal perspective, what would you share with the audience that would say, what are your biggest lessons learned at this stage of life, looking at life that that might be meaningful to them?

 

(22:08): Sure. So first we say, I have power over my own brain. I'm not gonna be happy from something outside myself. So if I wait for the world to make me happy, I'm gonna wait too long. . So what can I do to make myself happy? But of course we all know that that doesn't mean short-term happiness. Like you sit around and eat a pint of ice cream. So how do you balance this long-term versus short-term? So I talk about having a long-term goal, a short-term goal, and a middle-term goal. And in order to reach your goals, a lot of times, well, so a short-term goal is like I can reach it today, so I'm gonna get some hit of dopamine every day. That nice sense of accomplishment by setting a realistic goal, by breaking down what I want into small steps that I could actually do.

 

(23:00): And then the other part is like to achieve long run goals, I might have to do some things that are uncomfortable. So what can I do about that uncover? Well, instead of getting into like a cortisol spiral where you know I do something that feels bad and then that triggers another bad feeling and another, and another, I say to myself, okay, I'm gonna do this thing that makes me uncomfortable. I'm only gonna do it for five minutes. Or what, whatever's that reasonable chunk to tackle that obs obstacle. And then, you know, if I were gonna have a cup of coffee and a cookie anyway, I need to save it until after I've done that difficult thing. So that whenever I have it down, that I have an up that I can look forward to. And I have plenty of ups that have no calories, which in my life is comedy. But people can find their own.

 

(23:52): I love comedy cause laughing is so good for your neurochemistry . Yeah. Talk a little bit about laughing and what are some of your favorite things, ways to engage with comedy? Do you like standup movies? Like how do you get laughter in your life and what does it do for your neurochemistry?

 

(24:10): Sure. So laughter triggers endorphin, which is the body's natural opioid. And this is a widely misunderstood chemical. So an opioid is there to relieve pain and in the state of nature it's triggered by real physical pain. But because we have deep belly muscles that we don't use much, when you have a belly laugh, you get a little bit by giving those muscles a workout and you only get a little bit, but then you can laugh more and get a little bit more and it's the only healthy way to get them really, or the main healthy. And I explained this all in my books, so the way I get it. So I don't like bitter angry comedy and it's hard for me to find like truly uplifting comedy. And I know that if I look for comedy when I'm in a bad mood and like nine outta 10 of them are gonna be bitter, then I'm gonna just end up feeling worse, right? So I keep what I, I call, like when you're on a diet and you fill your pantry with healthy snacks mm-hmm. . So I fill my pantry with healthy comedy and I have a list of things that are ready for a bad day. So I know that when I'm in a bad mood, I have something uplifting that I could go to and I, I make that list on some other day rather than waiting until I'm in a bad mood.

 

(25:32): Yeah, I love that. And I love to laugh too. So one of my favorite go-tos I'm gonna share with everyone cuz you can use this, is I found this TV channel I, I'm sorry I don't re exactly know what it's called, but it's all videos of animals unscripted, they call it. Oh,

 

(25:49): I didn't write that down. .

 

(25:51): It's animals just doing what animals do mostly pets, right? Pet cats and dogs. They are hilarious. So it's just one video after another with no narration, no introduction of pets and Anna, there are some birds and different lizards and things doing the crazy things that animals do. So I'm gonna put a plug for that. And I'm also gonna put a plug for a re a movie I saw recently, I think it's from New Zealand that I think is hilarious. It's called The Breaker, uppers and . I literally laughed out loud so many times in that movie. So I gotta put a plug in for that. But I agree with you, laughing is huge. Another thing I wanted to touch on is that, you know, a lot of the people, women I work with, this might be you if you're listening, they're not so much concerned with their own worries, but worrying about others in their lives and what other people should be doing and trying to control them. And this one has to do this and what if they, what if my kid, you know, moves across the country to another state with my grandkids and then I won't be around them and they want to control what everyone else is doing. They're worrying about what everyone else is doing. You shared this quote with me before we started about it says, it's hard enough to manage your own brain, so stop trying to manage other people's brains. So I'm wondering if you can talk a little bit about that.

 

(27:18): Sure. So the feeling that I can only be happy if other people do X, Y, and Z, that my happiness depends on them. If you think that you'll never be happy . So it's just, you just gotta make a deal with yourself. I'm gonna be happy no matter what anyone does. And the simple way to do that, if I give you a visual image, if this other person does something and I think, oh no, I can't be happy because they're doing that, is I'm imagining that there's only one path to happiness and that person is blocking the path. But instead I'm gonna think there are thousands of paths to happiness and if this person blocks that path, I'll just find another P.

 

(28:04): Yeah. So stop focusing on everybody else . And you know, and it goes along with that same desire I used to have, well I'll be happy when this happens For me, that happens for me. And a corollary is I'll be happy when X person stops doing Y or X person starts doing why. And really I have decided at this point in my life that happiness only happens in the now when I'm happy with myself. And it really doesn't have anything to do with anything to do with what anyone else does. And I can choose that. Yes,

 

(28:41): I I a way of saying that. I always say my husband gets on my nerves, but it's my nerves . So, but it's fine. I, it's my job to adjust my own nerves to love him for what he is. And I don't even have to love him in any specific way. That's my job to just decide,

 

(29:01): Yes, to decide it's a decision. I know the name of your company's inner Mammal Institute and you take people on zoo tours to see animals behavior and I'm wondering if you can share with everyone, what does that do for the people who participate? How does it enrich their understanding? Sure.

 

(29:21): So I learned so much by watching nature documentaries and the simple fact of life in the interest of time, I'm just gonna say it straight, like animals are quite nasty to each other. And I learned that from watching nature videos. And yet what I learned from academic social science is that the state of nature is all peace and love and something has gone wrong with our world, but that's just not true. So we have this animal nature which is very motivated by self-interest and we really struggle to manage and navigate and control this inner mammal that is just wanting to grab the next banana. So how can I manage my inner mammal? And like I always feel like other people wanna grab my banana. That's easy to see. But what about my own impulse to get another banana and my feeling of like they took that banana at my expense.

 

(30:20): That's how the mammal brain works. So nobody likes to see this in themselves, everybody wants to see it in other people. So that's why we really need to be exposed to the reality of animals. Now to tell you the truth, you don't visually see that in the zoo because the pet world is not the same as the state of nature where animals are not fed. They have to get their food, they have to hide from predators. So the zoo tour is really a fun way to talk about this. But if you watch the nature videos of David Attenborough, especially his early series, then you really get get the facts. And I got them then from that like evolutionary biology books is how, and I have a reading list on my website and it's all in, in all of my books. I put this in a simplified form of why animals are nasty to each other and how we can feel it and manage it and relax with

 

(31:21): It. Yeah, you know, it's interesting, I just came back from four months in Africa and went on safari a few times. So I got to see those wild animals in their natural habitat habitat. And it was very instructive to see how they work both communally but also very selfishly in some ways. And I saw what good boundaries the animals had because at certain points in their existence, well for instance the wiles at one point we were driving up to, so in this Serengeti, or no, we were in the in goro goro crater in Tanzania. And most of it was extremely dry so there wasn't a lot of vegetation for a lot of the animals to eat. And then we came upon this place where there was a river and it was very green and lush and there were almost no animals there. And I said to myself and to the guide, why don't they just come over here and eat and drink water?

 

(32:22): And he said, because the lions know that that's where the animals are gonna go to eat and drink water. So they're afraid. And then I saw this group of will to be standing right outside this lush area and they were all huddled together facing the same direction. And one was out in front and he said, you see those will to bees, they are discerning. Is it safer, is it not? Where is the sun in the sky? What is the wind doing? What time of year is it? Is the lion gonna attack us now is it safe to go drink the water and eat or no? And so they were working communally, but then other times you would see them when there actually would be food and one would be pushing the other to try to get more of the food or more of the water. And so it was very interesting to me to observe that. Well

 

(33:14): I love those guides because they tell you the truth. Yes, don't get from academic psychology because academic psychology constructs this unrealistic, idealized world of peace and love, which is not what nature is about. And you get it from those tour guides and and you can get it without if you can't go there. You know, nat, a lot of some nature videos, you know, some of them are still hooked on the, the other unrealistic belief. But another simple example about the wildes that I learned from a nature video. So in order for them to get from, you know, they follow the grass year round, you probably saw how they migrate to wherever the grass is, but they have to cross a river and while they're crossing the river, they could die from a crocodile, they could die on the other side, you know, from a predator and then they could die when they jump in because another will toes could jump on top of them.

 

(34:15): So it's very difficult to make that decision. When am I gonna jump? They'd really rather not jump cuz the crocodile might get them, but if they don't jump, the rest of the herd piles up behind them and pulls them in and then they don't even get to jump, they just get shoved in with without balance. So they're constantly making this very difficult decision and you could see your own terror of like when you're a kid, like, do I jump or not? And so even what looks like herd behavior is a constant calculation of how much do I follow, how much do I, you know, take a step in a different direction. And our brain is making that decision every minute of every day. Am I gonna just follow the guy in front of me or am I gonna take a different step in a different direction? And you're calculating that with your best guess, which can never be perfect.

 

(35:09): Yeah. And I love what you said earlier about the fact that other mammals don't have the ability to imagine danger and humans do. There's a great book I wanna share with everyone called Why Zebras Don't Get Ulcers that clearly explains why zebras don't get ulcers, they don't have the imagination faculty and they really go through a process after they are stressed. So for instance, we, we saw this crazy wild chase of a leopard going into a herd of various types of gazelle like creatures and how they responded and, and I really got to see what's outlined in that book firsthand where these animals, when they go through a stress like being chased by a predator, they have a discharge process that they go through afterwards where they shake, and maybe you can talk a little bit about this and how it might apply to us. They go through a process to discharge that stress and reregulate their cortisol stress hormone, which I talk about all the time. This is really what's killing us. So how can we take that instructive information from a zebra's behavior and use it for our superior mammalian brains?

 

(36:23): Sure. You're also referring to, and and it's slipping my mind, there's a a book by another guy Levine about this shaking that goes on. So the idea is they discharge the stress and then they go back to what, what do they go back to? And this is what I talk about in my anxiety books. They go back to meeting their survival needs because if they just worry about predators all the time, they're gonna starve to death. So if they say, I'm not going out into that world unless it's a hundred percent safe, then they would to death. So hunger motivates them to deal with risk, to deal with potential danger to go out and meet their needs and only worry about danger when it's really there. Now the big human cortex says, oh no, that's stupid, I'm going to anticipate threats and avoid them. But if you spend your whole life anticipating threats and avoiding them, you're gonna just worry constantly.

 

(37:26): That's because our basic needs are met, that our lives are so comfortable that we could just stay home and do nothing unless we think it's a hundred percent safe. And one thing I blame this on, that's funny, I'm a bit older than you, I think I remember the years when, so cars broke down all the time and people said, oh, American cars are so bad, we should do what the Japanese did. And this is what I taught in the early years of my academic career. So the Japanese had this way of anticipating things that will go wrong in the production of a car and solving it at the source, fixing it at the source. And they said, that's what we have to do. We have to anticipate defects and fix 'em at the source. And so the whole education went on this bandwagon of anticipating threats and figuring things and preventing them so that quality would be a hundred percent and that had value, but it really made people nuts because now people think nothing can ever go wrong. We anticipate every possible threat and they literally, it's called the Toyota method that every tiny defect is a crisis because if you don't fix it now you're gonna produce a thousand more cars with the same defect. So you have to treat it as a crisis. So we were all indoctrinated to treat every tiny little problem as a crisis.

 

(38:51): Yeah, I think that's a great example. And you know it's done well for the car industry, but as a human species we really can't live that way. And thank you for saying that about the the worrying. Cuz there was something I was worrying about this morning and as we're talking, I'm thinking, why am I worrying about that? If it becomes a problem, I'll deal with it. I'm not gonna worry about it now

 

(39:16): . Yeah,

 

(39:17): Yeah. So can

 

(39:19):I give you another example of this that I think is very common? So let's say you get an email that asks you to go to some website and do this or that, and let's say it's something that you wanna do. So okay, I'm gonna do it. So you go to that website and you think, oh, this'll take five minutes and then a half hour has gone by and you still haven't done it. And like somehow I get really upset when I can't get something technical to work. It's really the problem is that I'm connecting it to every failure in my past is a real pathway in my brain. So one little failure today activates that old pathway like it's my failure pathway. You have your failure pathway. And what triggered it was really the expectation that I could do it in five minutes. So all I could do is just tell myself this is something hard, it's gonna take a while, and then all of the problem goes

 

(40:15): Away. Right. No, I love that. It really is how we frame the problems that we have. It's not the problems themselves that are the problem. What you think is the problem is not the problem, it's how you're thinking about the problem. So our thinking is always the problem. I know you have some great resources for everyone, but before we wrap up, I'm wondering if you could talk a little bit about the importance of oxytocin. That's another hormone. I don't think we talk merely enough about its importance and how to nurture our oxytocin.

 

(40:47): Sure. So in the animal world, animals seek groups for protection from predators. And in the oxytocin is the chemical that rewards you when you feel protected by a group. But this has been idealized in an unrealistic way in the current human dialogue. So we think that we should be protected all the time. And in fact, that's true for babies and that's why, as you know in the medical profession that oxytocin is central to maternal birth and lactation. But in the adult world, you're not meant to get this protection that you got as a child. So oxytocin moments are difficult and rare. Now how do I get my oxytocin moments? Well, whatever triggered my oxytocin when I was young built real physical pathways that tell me how to get it today. But that's also quite limiting. So the famous example is if you smell the cooking that reminds you of trust and bonding moment of your youth, then you seek that you want that, you think that will make you happy.

 

(41:57): But what we really want is protection. And in the adult world, we're never gonna get the protection of a child. And even when you were a child that protection was not perfect. So we have to accept that I have this natural logging for protection and I'm only gonna get moments of it rather than to have this perfect protection. So a simple example of a moment of it is people go to a concert and they're in this building with like thousands and thousands of people, whether it's music or a speech or an athletic event that you feel like you're sharing something that's important to you, but they're not really protecting you. Another example is if I tell my life story to a train a stranger on a plane, they're not gonna be there for me in the future. So it's like you look for these trust moments because letting down your guard is what is the oxytocin feeling? And what was so impactful to me, I learned that reptiles only have oxytocin when they're mating, which lasts for 10 seconds and the rest of the time no oxytocin because they don't trust their fellow reptile. So oxytocin is that feeling that I can barely tolerate your presence just enough to reproduce .

 

(43:24): . That's hilarious. , yes, oxytocin. I mean, people may know it as being the hormone that go is what causes labor in women, but it's also involved with milk production and bonding and connection and it interacts with your other hormones as well. So I'm gonna leave you all with a mandate to do something with your oxytocin today. What could you do to get some oxytocin just on a daily basis? You know, I think the past few years where a lot of us have been so isolated, we were legally bound in some instances, to not leave our home for much really has put a toll on our oxytocin, which unbalances our entire hormonal neuroendocrine cascade. So getting back to normalcy where we have in-person human interaction is key. So I want to challenge everybody listening to do something about your oxytocin to boost it going forward. And Loretta has a lovely gift for you and we'll have a link in the show notes to it. Do you wanna tell them a little bit about your download anxiety? What turns it on, what turns it off?

 

(44:41): Sure. It's a free book, P d F. It's the shortened form of my larger book, which is called Tame Your Anxiety, rewiring Your Brain for Happiness and Explains something. We haven't talked much about cortisol, the chemical that gives us the survival threat feeling and to sort of accept our own cortisol. It has a natural job and then to get real about the ability to manage it rather than to just let it take over and spiral.

 

(45:12): Awesome. Well thank you so much for that free gift, Loretta. If you are dealing with anxiety, I invite you to click the link in the show notes and learn what you can do to start taming your anxiety. Thank you so much, Loretta, for joining us for an episode of the Hormone Prescription Podcast.

 

(45:33): Sure. Thanks for the great

 

(45:34): Questions and thank you for joining us today. Hopefully you will implement some of the things that we've discussed so that you can move towards greater hormone balance and brilliant health. Thanks again and I'll see you next week for another episode of the Hormone Prescription Podcast with Dr. Kiran. Until then, peace, love, and hormones

 

(45:54): Y'all. Thank you so much for listening. I know that incredible vitality occurs for women over 40 when we learn to speak hormone and balance these vital regulators to create the health and the life that we deserve. If you're enjoying this podcast, I'd love it if you'd give me a review and subscribe. It really does help this podcast out so much. You can visit the hormone prescription.com where we have some free gifts for you and you can sign up to have a hormone evaluation with me on the podcast to gain clarity into your personal situation. Until next time, remember, take small steps each day to balance your hormones and watch the wonderful changes in your health that begin to unfold for you. Talk to you soon.

 

► Get a FREE copy of Dr. Loretta Breuning's Anxiety: What turns it on, What turns it off. CLICK HERE.

 

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